Monday, February 13, 2012
The Love Letter Campaign: Our Love Story
My love, my life, my battle buddy,
I struggle to put into words how much I care, love and adore you. I envy you most days. As odd as that sounds, your strength, dedication, will power, love…this list goes on and on. You went to war for a country you love, for people you have never met and never will meet. You stood tall for a president who cared enough about another country’s people to rid them of an evil ruler. You stood strong for a life every parent wants for their children-freedom, hope, safety. Now you walk a road of misery and pain. You wake every morning baring the scars of that war. You are reminded daily of the price you paid for what you can proudly call YOUR country. You live now with memories that haunt your waking and sleeping moments. Your children reach for the stars knowing that their daddy built a path for them. I love you for all of these reasons and more. I gave birth to three wonderful images of your heart. I spend every second of every day smiling inside because I get to continue to spend those same seconds with you by my side. You have demons who linger around your spirit and soul. You have a wounded soul. Because we are soul mates I share those wounds with you. I am now your battle buddy in this new war you fight every day. I lay awake at night just listening to your breath; your heat beat because I can’t get enough of you in the waking hours of the day. While you are at work during the day I imagine you being by my side at home. I want you to know that you will never be alone as long as I walk this earth. You will never have to suffer the pains alone. I will be right here holding your hand, cradling you heart in my hands. I lend you my soul and breathe to help you heal. I slip soft kisses on your scars and wish them to fade enough that you can move on. I will always love you, and I can say this with 100% honesty because that day that I almost lost you my soul cried. That day I walked in, early in the morning hours to your hospital room, stood by your bed with your hand rested on our unborn child I knew that we would be okay. Our oldest boy softly slipped into your bed with him smiling up at you with such pride. He held your arm where your hand used to be and when you told him what had happen, he too knew that you and I were strong enough to make it all okay. I am happy to live this unknown future because I get to live it with you. As you worked each day to heal and recover from your fresh physical wounds I stood next to you, at times behind you to catch you when you were weak, sometimes in front of you to lead you when you were lost. When the paged turned and we started our new chapter as wounded souls, I knew we could do it because of your strength and mine together were as solid as a marble table top. At the birth of our last two children you stood by me and held our blessings in your arm so carefully, afraid of how the road ahead was going to be full of bumps. When we bought our first house, you shined with pride.
I basked in your glow, drank it up like ice cold water on a summer’s day. You took on work that would make you face the inner battle you didn’t want to fight. Now that we begin the next chapter in this wonderful love story, I stand with you as your battle buddy. We will reach each page together hook in hand. You ask how I know you can do it, how I can stay on this road with you. I know because I can see how strong your soul is, even wounded it doesn’t fail. I love you each day. I miss you when you are not with in my sight. I breathe in your essence every chance I get. I strive each moment to be everything you want, need and desire me to be. When I am weak you are strong, when you are weak I am strong…together, our love story will always go on. Thank you for making my life so wonderful and amazing.
Your pain, My love, Together we will heal.
This blog post is part of The Love Letter Campaign... a project started by FamilyOfaVet.com to encourage those who love a hero to write a letter sharing their story (where they started, what they've faced together, and why their love endures). It's not just for spouses, but also for parents, siblings, caregivers, and friends. It's about telling the "rest" of our stories... stories that continue despite PTSD, TBI, and the challenges of life after combat. To share your love letter or find out more about the campaign, visit http://www.familyofavet.com/love_letters.html.